November 27, 1998

There were five Cajuns from Pierre Part sitting in the back of a pickup truck, traveling down the highway. They came to a bridge that was opened, but they didn’t stop and went right into the river. The driver jumped out and the five Cajuns in the back of the pickup truck drowned because someone had locked the tailgate!

I received some “pinulatos” from Dee Orcino from the St. Joseph table. I sure enjoyed them. Thank you Dee – you are so thoughtful to send me “pinulatos” every year.

Mrs. Lionel Grizzaffi used to send me some “pinulatos every year. I sure miss her and Lionel – they were lovely and caring people.

The best way to cure someone who walks in his sleep is to put tacks on the floor.

I enjoy football season every year. I hope the Saints end up with a winning season. I know LSU is going places – they have the horses. I also hope our Berwick Panthers end up with a winning season. If only the Panthers could recruit about 20 more ballplayers, they would be tough. You can’t be a winner with 30 ballplayers. You have got to have 50 or more – especially at the beginning of the season when it’s hot.

I met Patsy Thomas, Dave Thomas’ wife, on the Berwick Walking Trail. She told me how much she enjoyed my columns. Thank you, Patsy, for reading my column.

My wife has to take a picture with a fast camera if you want to catch her with her mouth closed.

Women’s hats are all different because no one likes to make the same mistake twice.

I met Lyle Chauvin in the bank recently. He hollered at me when he saw me. I was very glad to see Lyle. I remember when he was about 7 or 8 years old, he used to come to the Ber Theater with Faith (Faith Chauvin Mancuso), his sister. Faith was my cashier at the Ber Theatre. She used to give Lyle some money to go to Joe Pizzo’s and buy something to eat in the theatre. Lyle was her bodyguard when she went home at night when the theatre closed. Lyle, it was nice seeing you. It brought back so many old memories.

When my wife sings, I always stand outside on the porch. I don’t want the neighbors to think I’m beating her.

Mrs. Landry said, “Doctor, I’m in such pain that I feel like I just want to die.” The doctor said, “Well, you came to the right place.”

I got a phone call from Justice of the Peace Tracey Duval of Amelia. She just wanted to let me know how much she enjoyed my column “Recollections” in The Daily Review. Thank you, Tracey, for calling. Keep reading – there’s plenty more coming.

“Doctor!” shouted the nurse. “You know that man to whom you just gave a clean bill of health? Well, he keeled over on the front steps and died. What should I do?” The doctor said: “Turn him around so it looks like he was walking in.”

My wife has a real problem. She wants to have her hair dyed back to its original color – only, she can’t remember what it was.

Mrs. Landry was shaking as she sat down in the dentist’s chair. “Dr. Bourg,” she said, “I really hate coming to you to get my teeth filled. I think I would rather have a baby.” “Well,” said the dentist, “Make up your mind, so I’ll know which way to turn the chair.”

I got a big surprise when George Kruck brought me a big pot of split-pea soup. George never forgets me when he makes split-pea soup. Thank you, George. You are a good man. If you ever need me to do something for you, just give me a call.

* The End *

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